Julian Hollis

Which pattern is running your relationship?

Every book decodes one pattern — for the person living it, and the person trying to love them through it.

The Attachment Series

Books on attachment styles and how they shape love

One pattern per book, mapped from its origins to intimacy, rupture and earned security — for the person who carries it and the partner who loves them. Fearful-avoidant, dismissive-avoidant, anxious and secure attachment are all out now.

The Fearful Avoidant by Julian Hollis — book cover

Out now

The Fearful Avoidant

The Science of Fearful Avoidant and Disorganized Attachment — Why You Crave Closeness, Push It Away, and How to Heal, Whether It's Your Pattern or Your Partner's

Wanting closeness and fearing it in the same breath can look irrational from the outside and feel impossible from the inside. This full-length guide maps the whole of the push-pull pattern: where it begins, how it shapes intimacy and conflict, what it costs both partners, and what meaningful change requires.

More than a fearful avoidant workbook: twenty visual maps, a Decoder at the end of every chapter, a six-domain Profile, three Letters That Were Never Sent and 122 real questions answered.

The Dismissive Avoidant by Julian Hollis — book cover

Out now

The Dismissive Avoidant

Dismissive Avoidant Attachment Style — Why Closeness Feels Like Losing Yourself, Why You Pull Away, and How to Let Someone In, Whether It's Your Pattern or Your Partner's

A standalone guide to dismissive avoidant attachment, for the person who needs distance and the partner who feels shut out.

The Anxious Attached by Julian Hollis — book cover

Out now

The Anxious Attached

Anxious Attachment Style — Why You Overthink Every Text, Fear Being Left, and Love So Hard — and How to Feel Secure, Whether It's Your Pattern or Your Partner's

A standalone guide to anxious attachment, for the person who feels closeness deeply and quickly, and the partner who wants to understand the reaching.

The Secure Attached by Julian Hollis — book cover

Out now

The Secure Attached

Secure Attachment Style — What Healthy Love Actually Looks Like, How Secure Connection Feels, and How to Build Secure Relationships

A secure relationship guide to what secure love actually looks like from the inside — the destination the other books point toward.

Further Attachment Series titles are in preparation.

The Relationship Series

Books on dating, relationships and modern love

The problems you can name before you can name the pattern — mixed signals, undefined relationships, commitment doubt, the conversation you keep postponing. Each book pairs the psychology with assessments, decision tools and word-for-word scripts for the conversations that decide things.

Why You're Still in the Situationship by Julian Hollis — book cover

Out now

Why You're Still in the Situationship

The Psychology of Undefined Relationships and the Exact Words to Get Clarity, Commit, or Walk Away

You act like a couple. You just can't say the word. The complete guide to undefined relationships: the psychology of why you're stuck, the instruments to find out where you stand, and the exact words to get clarity — whatever the answer turns out to be.

Five profiles, full-page assessments, ten script sections and a decision system for the relationship that has no name. Read the first chapter →

Further Relationship Series titles are in preparation.

Not sure where to start?

Start with the pattern you recognise — or the problem you can name before the pattern has a name. Wanting closeness and fearing it: The Fearful Avoidant. Needing distance, or loving someone who pulls away: The Dismissive Avoidant. Overthinking and fearing being left: The Anxious Attached. An undefined relationship: the situationship book.